Archive | April, 2013

Fitness and Geek-ness; Not Mutually Exclusive

24 Apr

I’m a geek. I sometimes hate to admit it, but it is, unfortunately, the case. When I was younger, it was painfully obvious. I was tall and ridiculously skinny with a pimply face and bad hair. I played in the marching band and did math league. I mean, seriously, I don’t think it gets any more geek than that. Sports were not even a consideration. My mom will tell you I “played” soccer in like second grade and I wandered around the field staring at the sky. The only part of being fit that I worried about was being “fit into my own locker” by someone much larger than me. I finished high school in the top 10 percent of my class and went off to RIT on a partial academic scholarship, where I failed to apply myself and eventually left for a variety of reasons after a couple years. At some point between graduating from high school and leaving college, I filled out a bit. Meaning, I got bigger and broader shouldered but not really fatter. At 21 I started working at the ambulance and I had a partner who was a few years older and was getting chunkier by the day. I loved to bust Scott’s stones and remind him how fat he was. He told me to wait until I was 25 – everything changes when you hit 25. Now mind you, at this point in my life, I don’t exercise, I eat whatever I want and I never gain an ounce. Life was good. At 24 I got hired as a firefighter. I knew I would need to be fit in better shape for the academy, so I came as close as I have ever come to a fitness “routine” and by the time I finished the academy I was 6’2″, 216 pounds and probably as fit as I had ever been in terms of endurance and strength. Now mind you – this should not impress you – but it makes the point of where I was in life. 3 years later, I went for my physical for work and I was 27 years old and 246 pounds. 30 pounds in 3 years – so that’s what Scott was talking about. Everything waxed and waned from there. Up and down in weight, fitter, fatter, diets, eating binges, but one thing remained consistent – I was horribly inconsistent.

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The Cube Steak Journey

4 Apr

One of my fondest memories of my childhood is my Mom’s cube steaks. Her recipe went something like this:

  1. Place cube steaks in electric frying pan with onion soup mix and some water.
  2. Cook forever or until the texture is similar to that of shoe leather.
  3. Serve weekly to children.

Now, I love my Mom, and although if I needed help with my math homework growing up I found Dad, her cooking didn’t generally fail us. She taught me how to cook and how to bake, and I am a better man for that. Side note – for all the people that I pissed off because you think those last 2 sentences were sexist – that’s not what I am getting at. She just sucked at math, and we have always enjoyed reminding her about it. No, seriously, I could write a whole blog post about how long to cook a 9 pound ham.

The point is this: I’ve spent the better part of my adult life avoiding ever having to eat another cube steak. And until today – I was successful. Continue reading